Why You Should Date Your Opposite

I used to, meekly, gaze into the mirror at myself and think not too far from figuring myself completely out. Even at a relatively young age, I already thought I had a good majority of my character and, therefore, life figured out. I'm quite creative. Bright. I'm adept at mathematics. This assumption, as I've grown and grow to know as irrational, continues to change every day. Luckily, I have elected to take this plunge into diversion with someone who is different. Someone who challenges the qualities and liveliness I've fought hard to create comfort in. I relay, for the sake of this article, that love, along with life, begins outside of your comfort zone. Learning to live and love someone who you consider your opposite can be rewarding and edifying above the friction you subsequently encounter. 


Less important, I do believe there is a perfect person for everyone. But, perfection does not always equal true. To be honest, I rarely believe it to be unfeigned. Relationships are what you work for. It's hard to feel accomplished in someone, and your accord, that seems to come easy. What you don't work for becomes contented. Therefore, without work, it becomes hard to measure the progress and development within your relationship. It becomes easy to grow comfortable and lazy. 



The friction of loving someone opposite of you highlights exactly what you bring to the table. And what you must improve upon. Two are forced to work on and, simultaneously, keep track of the qualities, attitudes, and flaws that detract from the relationship and the eculiarities that make it great. Sure, at any time, someone in the relationship can stop because the work is overbearing. However, the potential to grow becomes exponential. What you grow to respect, understand, and cherish becomes a sort of prototype to the greater person you possess.


Personally, my perfect world was shattered in a matter of weeks. Accepting your flaws as a challenge, rather than a setback, is perhaps the most difficult part. But, finding someone to take that challenge with, through ups and downs, becomes the most invigorating experience. And, watching the other person contemporaneously transform into something beautiful adds quality to the thing we call life. Veritably, I shock myself into disbelief at the person I thought I fell in love with in the beginning because of who I see and hear today. As we get older, we depend on our relationships to evolve and transform with all that materializes around us. An imperfect relationship best illuminates that. 


Now, more than ever, I understand the power in forcing yourself to be better with someone else. It takes guts. But, I would much rather not look into the mirror at someone with an abundance of potential, to be squashed in complacency. Through the extraordinary, contrasting eyes of someone who still chooses to love you, the affirmation of character and, life itself, stands. Outside of my comfort zone, I've found the adaptability in love and believe it profound in its diversity.  Although uneasy, I find the medley conquerable and invaluable. 



Special thanks to my girlfriend, Jasmine.

DeMarcus Richardson